At Somerville Intermediate we care about your health and wellbeing. We want you to be the best person you can be. We face many challenges in life and we want you to be resilient members of society. The links below can help us be the best we can be and give us strategies that we all need to become the best version of ourselves.

 

It's okay to reach out for help - never hesitate if you are concerned about yourself or someone else.

 

Youthline

https://www.youthline.co.nz/
Youthline is a support service for any questions you may have. If you don’t want to call they also have a many different advice pages on body, social, mind and beyond school issues.

Aunty Dee

https://www.auntydee.co.nz/

Aunty Dee is a free online tool for anyone who needs some help working through a problem or problems. It doesn’t matter what the problem is, you can use Aunty Dee to help you work it through.

The low down

https://thelowdown.co.nz/
The low down is a free help line that gives you straight up answers for those up and down moments in life.

What’s Up

https://www.whatsup.co.nz/
A safe place for you to talk about anything at all. If you don’t feel like talking their website also gives some amazing tips.

Kidsline

http://www.kidsline.org.nz/Home_312.aspx
A free calling support service for when you need to talk about your feelings and life in general.

 

Counsellor's Comments

Resilience for Pre-Teens - hang on in there!

As we all know, the final term at school is crazy busy with academic deadlines, special assemblies, Life Education, Big Day In and Big Day Out, orientation visits, College testing, Syndicate odysseys, Athletics day, various mixed sports tournaments - goodness the list goes on and on! And of course, the added bonus of the preparation and excitement around Christmas and festivities!

Its in this super busy time, it's so important for parents and students to be kind to themselves. To try and create a balance in your life with getting sufficient sleep, eating well, relaxing (down time), hanging out with friends and having fun.
 
And on top of everything going on, as a parent, you know so well that life can be pretty tough and stressful for your child. Your child may face problems ranging from feeling anxious about their work load at school, feeling confused or upset about friendships, coping with their parents' separation, to the death of a friend or parent.

As a parent, I often want to show my kids that their issues are “real” but it’s not the end of the world! That they will work the “thing” or “issue” that’s bugging them out and life will once again  return to some sort of normality! I also try to embody the importance of the skill - resilience. As parents, we recognise that resilience isn't something you're born with - the skills of resilience can be learned. Resilience is the ability to adapt well in the face of difficult, hard and/or sad times, it is what makes some people seem like they've "got bounce", while others don't.

Below are some tips that you might find useful to help build resilience in your pre-teens.

  • Get together…gently and subtly check in with your child. Ask about their day, what they are working on at school or what events are coming up at school….spend some one on one time together…catch a movie…hire some lime scooters…grab a hot chocolate at the local …
  • Try and impress on your child to be kind to themselves physically, mentally and spiritually. Sleep is imperative and lack of it, as we all know, heightens any negative thoughts that might be worrying your pre-teen.
  • Encourage your child to create “a hassle-free zone” or a “safe –zone”. Maybe make their room a haven free from stress and anxieties. Together paint one wall their favourite colour or let them decorate how they choose to … with posters … photos… sayings …songs … or rearrange their room.
  • Maybe inspire your child to express themselves. Tragedy can bring up a bunch of conflicting emotions, but sometimes, it's just too hard to talk to someone about what you're feeling. If talking isn't working for them, maybe suggest that they do something else to capture your emotions like start a journal, colour in or create art.
  • Celebrate every success or accomplishment that happens to your pre-teen, however big or small!  Even in the midst of tragedy, reiterate to your child they will move towards goals, even if it is one small step at a time. Talk about that bad times make us feel out of control and by taking decisive actions, we actually grab some of that control back.
  • Gently help them to put things in perspective. That the very thing that has them stressed out, may be all anyone is talking about now. But eventually, things change and bad times end. Introduce some relaxation techniques, whether it's thinking of a particular song in times of stress, or just showing them how taking a deep breath, will calm them down. When you talk about bad times with them, make sure you talk about good times as well.
  • Try and impress the skills of resilience that they learn during really bad times will be useful even after the bad times end, and they are good skills to have every day. That resilience can help you be one of the people who've "got bounce."
  • As we know, developing resilience is a personal journey. Keep believing in your pre-teen … even when their responses are monosyllabic … short … or dismissive!